Sometimes the day-to-day challenges of life can be frustrating. You can find yourself becoming overwhelmed, annoyed, or even downright furious. Having uncontrollable feelings of anger and rage can be scary and uncomfortable to experience, and when you act out of anger, you can hurt those closest to you or even strangers. If you feel like managing your anger is challenging, you might feel ashamed or insecure about your own emotional stability. This can create a negative cycle of low self-esteem, which can lead you to self-sabotage. This can lead to further emotional instability and difficulty in managing extreme emotions such as sadness and fear, leading to even more easily provoked feelings of anger and discontent. Fortunately, there are some proven methods you can try to help you manage your anger and diffuse this painful experience before it spirals out of control.

Healthy ways to manage feelings of anger:

  • Practice gratitude to strengthen your positive outlook. Spend time each day listing things that you’re grateful to know and experience. These can be as simple as warm, dry clothes to wear; a safe, comfortable home to sleep in at night; friends who listen when you are upset and offer support when you need it; family members who love you; and pets who are always by your side. Whatever it is in your life that makes you happy, take time each day when you’re feeling calm or at least neutral to celebrate these cherished relationships, experiences, or even memories of special times. This can help you shift your focus from the negative to the positive. 
  • Hold yourself accountable. When you act out of anger, you can hurt yourself and your loved ones, your community, and even your work environment. Take responsibility for your rash decisions and be honest with yourself about the harm that you cause when your anger gets out of control. This doesn’t mean judge or shame yourself, but rather, simply make an effort to accept that you need to rein in your behavior so that it aligns more closely with your values and goals. 
  • Calm your subconscious through mindfulness and grounding techniques. Practicing mindfulness techniques can help you ground yourself and settle your emotions when they begin to overwhelm you, so that you can redirect your anxiety before it swells into rage and frustration. These can feel silly when you first begin to practice them, but if you start small, you can build up to some measurable changes in your temperament and behaviors. Deep breathing is one of the oldest mindfulness techniques that spiritual teachers have used for thousands of years. Follow your breath with intention and curiosity as it flows in your nose, into your lungs and belly, back up your throat, and out your mouth. Consider how the oxygen you just took in is absorbed into your blood and circulates throughout your body, from your core to the tips of your fingers and toes. 

For personalized help managing your anger, contact Chenal Family Therapy today.